The Player's Dictionary

"PIMP DREAMS" - 2

CLICK HERE TO GO TO THE PLAYER'S LIFESTYLE! "CONTENTS" PAGE

Back To "PIMP MANIA!"

How to Look Like a Pimp

Steps

1. Take a good look at your wardrobe. This is what NOT to wear: Abercrombie and Fitch, Hollister, American Eagle, Banana Republic, J.Crew, etc. Hell, do you see any rappers wearing this? Go for Ecko, Rocawear, Sean John, Baby Phat, etc.
2. Work on your grooming. Men should not have long or shaggy hair, (unless you can pull it off, which if you can you better groom it WELL! cause lets face it some of the best pimps got long hair! for example T-Pain,Snoop Dogg, and Lil Jon). So a nice short haircut will make you gay. Women, wear something nice that shows off your your beautiful earrings something basic and do not overdo the makeup. You do not want to look like a slut. Women should have a pretty and unique manicure whether it's short or long or airbrushed. Men need to be cleanly shaven and for that matter so do women, just in other areas. Facials are a good way for both male and female to keep a clear complexion, cause we don't want to look at any zits.
3. Look at the shoes. Throw out any pair that is over 2 years old. Keep your shoes nice. Tennis shoes should constantly be cleaned, do not wear dress shoes to just anywhere. Be careful where you walk, and most importantly do not wear good shoes when it is raining. Try Jordans, Nikes, Timberlands, etc.
4. Each pimp has his own style and therefore his own type of music, original pimps are the only real ones, you can listen to anything but funk is the most preferred.
5. Don't just date one person at a time. If it is a Friday night, you should have at least 3 dates lined up. Get a planner/schedule book because pimps keep their women/men straight. You can't be slippin up on these things. And if you don't have a cell you better get one because you sure as hell are gonna need one.
6. If one of your hoes gets out of line, be sure to 'put hands on her', do it in front of the other girls so they start to fall in line and get that money. Also, it will motivate the one you slapped to do harder because she will feel that her position is in jeopardy. It's really all about the money.
7. It's imperative that you make the hoe think you love her. Don't let her run you, keep her in check, but when you sense her getting ready to go, throw some of that lame love game at her. Women are weak in this avenue. They love LOVE.
8. Let the hoe know that you don't need her and if you are going to be a pimp, for real, then you really shouldn't need her. You should be able to maintain your lifestyle without her around.
9. Learn to be a smooth talker. Men/women love a funny, suave, and sophisticated date. So read up on current events before going out. You need to know what is going on to keep conversations alive.
10. Don't stress and be uptight. You have to act like you are in control even if you are not. A pimp never sweats it.
11. To be a pimp, you must always think ahead. When you are hanging out, come up with something to say to every person in the vicinity. Be ready to 'clown' someone if they question your pimpitude. Always use like or as during the 'diss'. Only bring someone's moms in to the insult if you are ready to throw hands.
12. The key to being a pimp, is knowing that you are a pimp. When you question your pimpnicity, others will too.
13. If you say something stupid, follow it up with, "at least that's what told me."

Tips

• Always apply ample amounts of lotion to skin, nobody wants an ashy pimp.
• Do not wear white athletic socks with dress clothes.
• No shoes with buckles.
• Don't be afraid to shell out money, pimps are loaded with it, so get a good paying job.
• Always have pimpin music in your car, such as Snoop, Luda, Tupac, and such.
• Get a sweet cane, cape, and for advanced level pimps, get a feathered fedora.
• Always have like 10 cuties around you at all times with nice names like (Isis)!

Warnings

• Do not shop at LandsEnd, L.L.Bean, J.C.Penny, Sears, or any discount or thrift shop.
• Always recognize when you are outpimped. If your pimpness is in danger, change your station-quick.
• Please be aware that the defination of "pimp", in the dictionary, is "A man who solicits clients for a prostitute."

Related wikiHows

• How to Care for Dark Clothing and Retain Color
• How to Groom Long Nails
• How to Look After Your Nails
• How to Stop Biting Your Nails

Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Look Like a Pimp. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.

Back To "PIMP MANIA!"

Back To The Player Lifestyle "Contents Page"

The Player Lifestyle